Porn Play Set To Open

Deep Throat, one of the most famous adult films ever produced is set to open in Boston this summer, and rumour has it Ron Jeremy, Richard Dreyfuss and Thora Birch are in talks to star in it.

Before you monkey spankers run out to join the ranks of those who support the arts via legitimate theatre, you should know that the play is not about a woman who has a clitoris in her windpipe, but rather about adult icon Harry Reems.

Deep Throat - The Play deals with the story of how Reems got involved with the film and the events leading up to him being prosecuted for his part in the film once it was released. Reems is thought to be the only adult actor to be prosecuted for appearing in a film, and the event caused enough of a stir that Johhny Carson, Warren Beatty and Jack Nicholson helped pay for his defence.

Richard Dreyfuss has been linked to the part of Reems, while Thora Birch has been in talks to play the late Linda Lovelace, a cult figure in the world of 7o's porn. Other names being bandied about in relation to the production include The Sopranos' John Fiore, and porn legend Ron Jeremy as prosecutor Larry Parrish.

The play is set to open in Boston in June of this year, and will then move to New York in August where it will play at the World Theate, the very same theatre the original opened at all those years ago. It is still owned by the same proprietors.

Reems was actually involved in theatre himself when he started out as an actor, as were many of his contemporaries, and was excited when he learned of interest in producing a play of his life.

Whether the mainstream theatre going audience will be as excited (pardon the pun) over a play about porn reamins to be seen.

Some people might find it too much to swallow.

Canada Owes Apology For Avril

The Evolution Of Avril Lavigne

Once upon a time, a little girl got up on stage and sang at a Shania Twain Concert. The crowd was amazed at how well this tiny teen could belt out country music hits. On that day, Avril Lavigne was discovered...one of the darkest days in Canadian history.


There is the pseudo-punk pop version of Avril, which burst onto the scene with the smash hit Sk8erboy. She was known for her tie and wife-beater t shirts, 'badass attitude' and constant cirticism of Britney Spears for being fake. This got old pretty fast.

Then there was the slightly more mature Avril. she had grown a bit, and was determined to shine a light for young girls about being themselves and not giving in to peer pressure, blah blah blah. She always said she could never see herself as the pretty girl type wearing fancy clothes. Of course, when she says something, you know she means it.

Lastly we have the upscale Avril. She has shed her Dickies and Doc Martens and embraced the haute couture she previously derided. Her music, which seemed to be leaing towards a more mature sound at one point, still speaks of junior high drama. 'Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your Girlfriend?'

Sure, I have 15 or 20 minutes to spare.

There are many great Canadian musical acts, many virtually unknown in the USA or other parts of the world. Kathleen Edwards, Feist, The Tragically Hip...all excellent acts.

So consider this an official apology for Avril Lavigne...think of her as payback for Britney Spears.

Bigger Breasts Worth Buying In Bulk?

When it comes to buying breasts, is bigger really better?

Cosmetic suregery gets more and more popular as prices for procedures come down and more and more treatments are discovered.

Breast implants are still up there with the most popular of augmentations, but is super-sizing really smart?

Maxi Mounds, seen in the photo, is listed in the Guinness Book of World Records for having "World's Largest Augmented Breasts." Her fake funbags are a massive 42M... while her measurements are an incredible 156MMM-26-36!

What is the porn princesses' silicone secret? Silly string implants, which are polypropylene implants that keep on growing after implementation. Sound too good to be true? Well it almost is, since the FDA does not approve of their use at this current time.

For the curious,the world's largest natural breasted woman is Norma Stitz. Her mammaries are a jaw dropping 48V , and her measurements are 72-48-52. If you're thinking that is a whole lot of woman, you're right. Each of her breasts is rumoured to weigh a whopping 35 pounds each.

But are bigger breasts as appealing as they look? Maybe not, if you consider the story of Miss Lolo Ferrari. She is recognized by the Guinness Book of World Records under the number of augmentations category. After what is thought to have been 18 and even as many as 30 boob jobs, Lolo achieved a 54 J bra size, but suffered from a number of medical problems as a result, and had to rely on prescription drugs to cope.

Her breasts held as much as 3 litres of surgical serum each, and were supposedly designed by an aircraft engineer. Ironically, she had a fear of flying because she was scared they might explode, and she also had difficulty breathing and could not sleep on her back due to their immense mass.

Ferrari actually died in 2000 under suspicious circumstances, and her husband was briefly arrested in regards to the matter. Murder was considered, as was suicide, but his theory was that she actually suffocated under her own boobs. He was eventually charged and placed in custody, only to be released and compensated after her death was ruled to be a suicide.

Let that serve as a lesson to everyone out there considering a boob job, or trying to get their significant other to get one. Not only are dangers and complications a possibility with the procedure itself, but the after effects can also be quite a...handfull.

Bigger isn't always better.

5 Tips for Saving Money On Gas

With oil prices hitting record highs and service stations charging obscene amounts of money for that much needed gasoline, people might want to consider a few tips on how to get the most out of their fuel comsumption so they can save a few dollars at the pumps.

1. Streamiline to Save $$$

Wind resistance and aerodynamics play their part in how much fuel you burn going down the road. You may want to take off any superfluous rigging on your vehicle like ski racks, luggage mounts, roof-top storage...whatever. Reducing drag on your automobile can reduce the drag on you wallet by as much as 20 percent.

2. Relax On The Road

Using a laid back driving style with smooth acceleration and consistent cruising speeds can mean as much as a one third improvement in fuel efficiency. Use the cruise control on the highways and try to avoid the hard braking and acceleration that chips away at your pocketbook.

3. Timing Is Everything

Gas stations tend to increase their pricing as the weekend approaches, and then it levels off. Once midweek arrives, they are back down again, and by Wednesday morning they should be at their lowest. Pull in and load up on savings.

Also, the morning is a good time to buy gas since it is usually the coolest time of the day. Lower temperatures means denser gas by volume, which translates into more internal combustion bang for your buck.

4. The Right Gas

Unless your automobile requires higher octane or premium gasoline, regular octane will do the job. There is a difference between being recommended to use high grade fuel in your vehicle and being required. That diffenrce could mean extra money in your pocket when you pull away from the pump.

5. The Right Station

Full Service stations usually don't try and compete on price. That means you will be paying a premium for filling up at stations offering perks you don't need. Try and avoid the ones with tire centers, repair shops, attendants...whatever. Pump your own gas and enjoy your own savings.

You work hard for your money, so why pump it away to rich oil companies taking advantage of your need for fuel? Use some of these tips and put that money back in your pocket where it belongs.

Five Slain In Iowa City Shooting

Five people were shot and killed in an Iowa City, Iowa home today. The bodies of a woman and four children were discovered after emergency dispatchers received a call at 6:31 am that urged police to get there immediately. The unidentified caller then hung up.

What makes this case even more intriguing is that the adult male resident listed at that address is Steven Sueppel, who was indicted last month on charged of stealing somewhere around US$560, ooo during his stint as the vice president and controller of Hills Bank & Trust. He was not at home when the police arrived.

A further twist in this tale involves the missing family van which is now thought to have been involved in a fatal accident on a nearby Interstate. Police found the van ablaze and have trouble identifying the driver and establishing whether this is actually the missing van.

The 42 year old Sueppel was out on a quarter of a million dollar bail.

The VP of a financial institution, embezzlement, money laundering, fatal shootings, burning car wrecks...sounds like Iowa City just got a whole lot more interesting.

Bare Breasted Britney

Tanned, toned and topless, Britney's busoms are front and center when you enter her new website.


Seems like the princess of soft-porn pop took some time off from being chubby and crazy so she could click some pics for a brand spanking new site which is still under construction.

Spears, who has been suffering from some sort of much publicized emotional breakdown is set to appear on How I met Your Mother tonight. Having made the point she cannot sing, it seems she is keen to prove she cannot act either...as if Crossroads wasn't proof enough

Meanwhile her father is doing a bit of financial house cleaning, including selling off some of her seven luxury automobiles. Maybe the hope is the less the cars she has, the less people she can run over and the less objects she can hit.

Spears, who has lost custody of her kids, her sanity, and any semblance of good taste, never can understand why she gets asked about sexuality in her videos and songs, yet she appears to get more and more naked as her career drags on. Sex sometimes made up for a lack of talent in many a business, but somebody once said "you can't fix stupid."

Considering her audience is largely made up of pre-teen girls, it's almost an improvement to see that Ms. Spears showing less of her crotch and more of her cleavage these days.

It's what passes for classy with her.

Woman's Win Sets Slot Record

A woman from Woodbridge, Ontario set a new Canadian record last night when she won close to $9 million on a slot machine at Casino Rama.

53 year old Anna Falco had been playing the Megabucks Wide Area Progressive machines for close to an hour when all of a sudden she hit the record setting slot jackpot of $8,920,622.89, eclipsing the previous jackpot payout by over $7 million.

The progressive has been hit just 3 other times at the casino since its' implementation back in 2001. The previous amounts were $1.8 million won in December of 2002, $2.1 million in February of 2005 and $1.2 million in July of the same year.

Anna and her husband, Franco, plan to share the winnings with family and friends.

Makes you wonder just how many people lost their shirts before Falco got lucky...